I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
i permit you to call me
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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