i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize