We're like a lot better than the average bears
honey bunches of taint.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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