So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
