id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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