I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize