i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
