ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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