But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
