Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
