just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
