Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
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