i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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