..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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