Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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