just survived the first fart of the relationship.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
