google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
