What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
