I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
