Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
