so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Randomize