Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
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