Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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