jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
