operation have a gay friend backfired
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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