then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
i would punch a child for taco bell
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.