Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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