...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Terrible idea I love it
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize