Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
