great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
