i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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