Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
my liver is dry heaving
Randomize
