Sry I called you an 8
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
