what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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