Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
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