Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
