I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize
