i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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