Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
i am craving dick and cupcakes