I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?