You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
For the first time in my 26 years of life, I'm washing jizz out of my ponytail.... High five yourself later.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Randomize
