Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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