Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
