No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
