The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
