I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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