If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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