One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
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