so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize