the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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